So dysfunctional

Normally I wouldn't have it this way, but it was dark. He sat there, at a slant, maybe so I couldn't see the expressions on his face, but I'm sure it wasn't purposly, just something we had both become accustomed to. We rarely looked at eachother if at all. He sat there, with the joint just barely being clasped by his thumb and index but with help from his middle. The smoke rose and the ashes fell and i was so used to it that it barely bothered me.

I could tell he didn't give two shits about what i had to say, but at least we were talking. Well I was talking and I wish he would respond but he never did. He never does. I always wondered what he thought about when the silence hit the room. Was it me? Was it her? Was it the weed or the drinks or maybe a way to get out of this coalition? I don't know and I guess I never will.

I felt so senseless around him. He would look at me as if he had something to say or confess, but never did. I always waited for the moment when everything would just fall out. But it never did. So i sat there and thought about my life and his life and if this was right. Was it? No i honestly don't think it was but it was different. And for some abnormal reason, I was attracted to different.